Last night things came to a head and we discussed faith (particularly my current lack of it) and how we're both feeling in our relationship.

My feelings are raw.

A shrink would say the loss of my faith is a reaction to Y putting all his energies into the church at the expense of our relationship, and also putting those energies into other countries instead of focussing on the people in London (of course that's something for another post entirely).

A shrink would also say that my feeling 'friendless' is a result of our going to Brasil, and my subsequent depression. Two issues that may not have had the same impact if endured separately. Of course, that still doesn't change the fact that the people I'm closest to are my colleagues and the people I can really count on are my fellow bloggers. Yes, C may be here, but I've only really known her for a month and in that time it has become clear that we're at two different ends of a very long scale.

So, not only do I feel incredibly isolated in having no friends in the area and no reason aside from work to take me out of the house, when I do go out I'm (unintentionally on Y's part) made to feel that I shouldn't be out.

And now I'm rambling and have no idea where I'm going with this. . .